Title: Chocolate Lust
In the warehouse, Angel took the small packet away
from his minion, and
dismissed him. He looked at the packet and smiled. He opened it
carefully, and took a small whiff. Yep. It was just what he wanted, the
perfect means to get revenge on the Slayer and her friends, Angel
thought as his hand unconsciously curled around the small, floral
smelling packet. And this little drug was going to help him get back at
her and get his vampiric pride back. Then his eyes narrowed, as an
unbidden thought came into his mind. What shall I do about Spike?
Angel quickly stuffed the packet into his coat pocket
when he heard a
noise in the back of him. He turned to see Drucilla rolling Spike in,
and his eyes narrowed."Hello, where have you two been?"
"Ive been asleep, Angel,"Drucilla sang."And
I just took care of Spikes
needs like a good Mummy should."
"So what have you been up to?"Spike said
when Angels face narrowed at
Drucillas."Whats that you put in your pocket?"
Angel shrugged."Oh, nothing. Just a little thing
to me deal with a
"Ohhh,"Drucilla squealed."Will it kill
the Slayer? I want to help hurt
her! She ruined my very pretty dress!"
Angel looked at her affectionately, knowing that it
would bother Spike.
Then a plan struck into his mind. And he drawled,"Sure you can help,
Dru. Come to the school at midnight with Spikey boy here. Itll all be
ready. We can all watch the Slayer die, together. You and me..."
Then he looked at Spike, and added after a noticeable
Well all watch her die. Like a family should..."
"Oh, goodie,"Drucilla squealed again, her
hands clapping. Spike merely
looked at his sire warily, and wondered what he was up to.
The night was still young as Willow crawled into the Summers jeep. After
greeting Buffys mother, Willow turned to her friend,"So whatd you
Buffy smiled and lifted the still warm plate under
brought double chocolate chip cookies. Mom made them."
Willow squealed with delight."Ohhh, joy! And I
got chocolate cake with
chocolate icing! Cordys bringing chocolate milk! Wont Xander be
surprised! He thinks that its going to be a research and study party!
Wonder what Giles and Oz are bringing?"
"Hopefully, a bunch of toothbrushes for all of
you,"Buffy mom said
wryly. Buffy and Willow shared a glance."But, as far as I know, Mr.
Giles is trying his hand at making chocolate meringue kisses or scones,
God help you all."
Buffy eyed her mother suspciously."And you know this because...."
"He called me at the gallery two days ago trying
to figure out how big a
dollop was on a cookie sheet,"Joyce smiled wryly as she glanced at her
daughter."He remembered the batch of cookies and pastries that I gave
him for Boxing Day."
"Oh. Well, how did they come out?"Buffy
ventured, still trying to
imagine Giles in an apron, trying to bake something. And coming up
with...a really weird picture."Mom?"
Silence. Willow and Buffy looked at each other. "Ms. Summers?"
"Well here we are! Be good girls, and have fun!"Ms.
cheerfully."Tell Xander that Im really happy that he got an 1100 on his
"Mom! How did Giless cookies come out?"Buffy
demanded. Joyce merely
winked at her daughter and started to put the car into drive again.
Buffy held on to the passenger side door."Mom!"
Joyce looked at her daughter with a twinkle in her
eye, and gave in just
a little."Dont eat the scones, I didnt make them."
"All right now, what have you girls brought here?"
Giles asked as he
took out two plates from his office. Buffy offered her plate to Giles
with a large smile.
"I brought chocolate chip cookies and Willow
brought chocolate cake with
chocolate icing on it. Whatcha got there, Giles?"
He lifted his two plates proudly,"Chocolate
meringue kisses and
chocolate chip scones. Would you like to try a scone? Willow?"
"Oh God! Scones!"Willow blurted. Giles
looked at her, puzzled, as he set
down his plates.
"Willow? What was that you said?" Giles
asked. Willows eyes widened and
sent a quick glance at Buffy.
"I...ah...well,"Willow stammered."I said..."
"She said it was cold,"Buffy said quickly,
and smiled weakly at her
Watcher."It was a bit cold outside and so that made her cake cold and
chocolate cake really has to be hot or at least warm for it to taste
"Oh, well,"Giles said a bit puzzled."Ive never heard that before."
"Wheres Oz? Did he call?"Buffy asked
quickly to divert Giless
attention from his baked goods."Did Cordelia say when she was bringing
"Oz called and said that he was bringing
Chocolate soufflés. And
Cordelia said that she was bringing Xander at about eight thirty,"Giles
replied as he went back towards his office, and then came out with two
cartons of milk."She just left the chocolate milk in my small
refrigerator here before she went to go get him."
"Why is this carton opened? Giles?"Buffy
asked with a frown. Giles
looked slightly abashed, then cleared his throat.
"I, ah, ran out of cream for my tea, so I used a
little of it,"Giles
grimaced."I highly do not recommend chocolate flavored tea."
Willow grinned as Buffy rolled her eyes."Then
that gives us about twenty
minutes to get everything ready.Willow, lets go to your locker to get
the decorations and Giles, did you get the balloons?"
"In my car. Ill go get them,"Giles
said as he left the library with the
girls. The library was silent as Angel quietly came out from the stacks.
He smiled to himself. It was perfect. Here was a party, and a perfect
opportunity to gain his revenge on Buffy and her little horny and
He jumped over the railing and headed over to the food.
Taking out his
packet, he sprinkled the floral smelling powder over the food liberally.
Then he opened the milk carton, and sprinkled the rest into there, and
shook the container. < Ahhh, yes. Revenge in the form of powdered
instant lust. I *like* that. Only problem is that I have to be around
when it activates. The girls fall for me, and the dweebs fall for each
other. Now thats a plan! Where can I stay hidden? >
Title: Chocolate Lust (2/3)
Rating:R. (I think.)
Summary: Angel decides to get some revenge on the Scooby gang for all
the indignities that he has suffered so far. Problem is, things didnt
quite go as planned...
Authors Note: Can be seen as the final conclusion to 'Conversations in
the Ladies Room' series. (Maybe...)
Disclaimer: Joss and the WB owns all that you know and love. Im merely
borrowing them to amuse myself until the new season starts.
Content: Drugs, humor, violence, some nudity. Humor. Lust. Humor. (Im
giving in to my bizarre sense of humor again. One of these days, Ill
Authors Note:Feedback please!
Title: Chocolate Lust
"Oh, wow! This is great!"Xander said as he
wolfed down another piece of
cake."Delicious, Will! The best!"
"Yeah, Will, its a great cake,"Oz said
as he ate his piece. Then took a
healthy swig of his chocolate milk. "Great cookies too, Buffy. Great
"Yes, well, thank you. Dont call me that,"Giles
said as he munched on a
cookie."The Chocolate soufflé is delicious, Oz."
"Yeah, great cookies and cake, guys,"Cordelia
added as she munched on a
meringue kiss."These kisses are good, Giles. Didnt know you knew how to
Willow and Buffy exchanged glances, and avoided
looking at the odd
looking scones that Giles brought. He picked up his plate of scones,"I
made these, too. Would any one like-"
"What is going on here?"said a belligerent
voice from the doorway.
Everyone looked up to see the Dictator of Sunnydale standing with his
arms at his hips."What are you kids doing, eating in the library?"
"Principal Snyder!"Willow squeaked through a
mouth full of cake, and
promptly started coughing. Oz patted her on her back to help her
breathe. Snyder dismissed the star student of Sunnydale High School to
look furiously at the star troublemaker of Sunnydale High.
"Summers! Thought you were here, making trouble
again,"he snarled at
her."Eating here. In the library-"
Buffy opened her mouth to protest, when Giles quickly
eating is allowed, Principal Snyder. I am here to supervise this little
study party, and this *is* a designated area. We are congratulating
Xander on his SAT scores."
Snyder shot a look at the slightly smiling chocolate
theyre his real scores. Ill make sure of that before *any* celebration
"What-what do you mean by that?"Xander
stammered. Snyder dismissed him
with a sneer.
"How can a C-average student get an 1100 on the
something happened, like looking over your friends shoulders..."
Xander opened his mouth to protest, but Giles shoved
the plate of scones
in front of Snyders nose,"Care to have a scone?"
Snyder looked at the librarian warily as he
scrutinized the plate before
he took a scone."Im watching you. All of you. Now, break up this little
part and go home. Its late. And I want no dallying here. Especially
from you, Summers."
Snyder gave them all a hard look before he left the
library, then bit on
the scone that Giles made. "Ow! What the hell is this?"
Snyder looked at the small group furiously. Buffy
forward, protecting her Watcher."Mr. Giles told, you. Its a chocolate
"Keep it up, Summers. Keep it up,"Snyder
warned her as he left. The
little group watched him with leave with angry eyes, the party mood
"The little prickless troll,"Cordelia
muttered."Buffy, I really wish
that you would clean his clock just once."
"And get expelled? No thanks. I guess that wed
better go now,"Buffy
said wryly. Then an idea went to her head."Lets head over to the
Bronze. Giles, want to come?"
"No! I mean, thank you, but Im sure
that-"Giles stammered as he tried
to think of a quick way to get out of the invitation. Then he rubbed his
head, it was starting to hurt a bit. Xander shot the Watcher a quick
"Guess that youre all chocolate and Scooby
ganged out, G-man,"Xander
smiled."Its okay, youre off the hook. Want us to help clean this up?"
With that, Giles grabbed what was left of the
chocolate milk to take to
his office while the others divided the leftover goodies amongst
themselves. While he was gone, the Scooby gang looked at each other and
then at the still, full plate of scones.
"What are we going to do with *that*,"Willow
whispered as she cautiously
looked at the office door. Buffy frowned, then looked at the office
"We cant just leave them here, itll
hurt his feelings,"Buffy whispered
back. Xander snorted at the girls.
"Hes a man. He can take it. As a Watcher,
he is good. As a
baker,blech"Xander grimaced."So lets throw it out."
Willow shot him a look."We cant *just*
throw it out in the garbage!
Buffy grabbed two scones and shoved them into her
jacket pocket, then
grabbed a few more."Grab them and shove them into your pockets. Well
throw them out as soon as we clear the school. Quick!"
Everyone grabbed scones and started syuffing them into
pockets. Then Buffy frowned,"You, too, Cordy."
Cordy made a face and then grabbed one. Xander sighed
and shoved another
into her other pocket."Hey! Its a suede jacket!"
"Oh, well, everything done here?"Giles asked
as he came out from his
office. His hands still in the towel."Where are my scones?"
"We split them all amongst ourselves, to eat
later,"Oz said quickly with
a smile."And now, shall we all go to the Bronze?"
"Let me go to my locker first, "Xander said."I
want to get something. My
heads hurting. Think Im getting a cold."
"And we girls need to go wash our hands first,
and bring some of that
Advil for me too, Xander. I left my Midol at home,"Cordelia said as she
walked out with Willow and Buffy.
Then Buffy added,"I need something from my
locker, too. Feels like that
time of the month is coming for me."
Willow frowned at her."You too? Usually I have more warning than this."
"Maybe it was the chocolate,"Buffy joked.
Angel walked around the dimmed halls of Sunnydale High School with a
frown. < Where the hell is everybody? Dont tell me that I have to go
searching for them....Buffy never makes this easy. Always have to do
this the hard way, damn her! >
"Here we are, my sweet,"Drucilla announced
as she rolled Spike through
the entrance of Sunnydale High."Now, where is the party?"
"Got that on me, ducks,"Spike said as he
looked at the school grounds.
They had managed to come in through the back, and saw the enclosed
picnic area for the students. Then he pointed to an open door."Lets get
in through there, pet. I think that leads to the lounge."
Drucilla complied with a shrug."So when do we
kill the Slayer with
She grabbed hold of the soda machine as another shot
of pain went
through her. Buffys lower abdomen was cramping her beyond belief, she
*never* felt this bad, even when she was beaten up by the last three
vamps that kicked her gut. < Oh, I dont think that Ill be able to make
it to the Bronze tonight. >
When the pain left her, she lifted her head up, and
saw two familiar
figures coming across the school grounds. Then a shot of pain went
through her head, and her hazel brown eyes, cleared, and focused slowly.
Her breath grew short, and her nipples started constricting while heat
shot down to her nether regions as her eyes concentrated on the sitting
figure coming towards her."SPIKE!!!"
Giles grabbed his head in pain as he walked out of his
office. He was
not feeling well at all, and there was a painful tightness in his groin
that he was unaccustomed to. At least, these days he was. It was more
familiar when he was around Jenny, but since she wasnt here. And hasnt
been since her betrayal, there was no tightness. And he refused to think
of her anymore. < Brave words, Rupert, old man.>
Another shot of pain went through his head as Angel
stormed into the
library, snarling."All right, Buffy! Where are you?"
Rupert lifted his head up, and saw the one that his
Slayer once loved.He
Angel swung to see the Watcher, and his yellow eyes widened. "Oh, shit!"
"Angel! My love!"Giles shouted as his arms
stretched out to embrace
Angel. Angel stared at the Watcher, stunned at what he called him.
Rupert took advantage of the vampires surprise and grabbed the vampire
and started kissing his face madly, throwing him back against the
counter. Angel, gaining his senses back, grabbed the nearest thing he
could and hit the Watcher with it, stunning him.
Angel then threw the book at the librarians
still form and ran out of
the library, snarling one name. "BUFFY!"
"I need some air,"Willow mumbled as she went
through the doors clutching
at her lower abdomen."Oh, God! Ive never had PMS this bad before!"
Willow clutched at the stomach, and leaned over the
balcony, ready to
throw herself over if the pain didnt cease. < Well, not literally ready
to throw myself over the balcony. >
Another shot of pain went to her head, and when it
cleared, she opened
her eyes, and saw two familiar figures walking across the lawn, towards
the student lounge. When another shot of pain made her wince, she
moaned. Then her eyes opened, and focused on the clearest face she could
see, and heat shot through her entire body, making her feel like one
tight nerve that her tiny body trembled. In a second, Willow ran down
the stairs, not hearing the scream behind her,"SPIKE!"
Cordelia groped through the door just in time to see
Willow fly down the
stairs that Harmony was once pushed over. "Willow! Stop that screaming!
Youre making my head pound! God, kill me now!"
She was in the bathroom when her lower abdomen shot
pain through her.
Then pain went through her head, and she decided that Willow should help
her to Xander. < After all, arent geeks stronger than cheerleaders? >
Another shot of pain went through her as she steadied herself on the
railing of the staircase, when she opened her eyes, she took in a sharp
breath. Cordelia felt moisture gather at the juncture of her thighs as
her nipples tightened. Screaming at the top of her lungs,"Spike!"
"Whoa, man, Oz, my heads hurtin real
bad,"Xander said as a shot of
pain went through his head. He stuck his head into the locker, when a
flash of heat made him harden. He could barely concentrate when Oz
"Yeah, like man, my heads feelin like
it was used as a punching
bag,"Oz said. < And my dicks as hard as a rock! >
< Damn, I havent been this hard since
cheerleading tryouts! > Xander
grabbed his head. "Yeah, maybe if were not feeling so well, we should
go home. Think-Ow!"
"Yeah-Arrgh!"Oz moaned as he grabbed his
head. Both boys lifted their
hands from their heads and felt their respective members harden. When
the pain was fading from their heads, their heads slowly rolled up. Then
they heard a shout, and lifted their heads quickly towards the sound.
Angel raced down the dimmed halls with the lust-filled
Watcher hard on
his heels. He cursed loudly," SHIT! SHIT! This wasnt supposed to
"ANGEL! Come back! ANGEL! I LOVE you!"Giles shouted as he chased the
vampire down the hall."Let me love you! Angel! We could sit together in
the dark and read each other sonnets!"
Angel turned around to a corner and saw the *other*
two dweebs staring
at him. His eyes widened as sense of unreality slapped him. The smaller
man took a step forward towards Angel."Man...youre a vampire....a
Angel started backing away. Then his head swung when
he heard the Geek
king speak what Buffy once called Salivating American Boy Talk."Dur
Angrl! Angrl Duh Butriul!"
Without thinking, Angel stared at Xander. Xander
throat."Angel...youre beautiful...in an evil vampire sort of way,
but...Oh, god, I never noticed! I think I love you!"
Angel gave a howl of fury and was about to attack the
boy when he was
tackled from behind, and he went down. Strong hands flipped him over,
and he saw the Watcher sitting on top of him."Angel, my sweet! Ive
finally caught you! Come, let us be together!"
"Giles! You love Angel too?"Xander shouted
in surprise. He grabbed the
Watcher by his tweed lapels and forced him to face him."But I LOVE him!
I saw him first!"
"Wait, a min, this is so like, not good,"Oz
protested as he caressed
Angels growling face."I love him too! Hes so beautiful! Look at him,
hes like Adonis, man!"
With a howl, Angel flung all three men off of him, and
HELL AWAY FROM ME YOU DWEEBS!!"
Then he heard a distant scream that sound strangely like..."SPIKE!!"
As Drucilla neared the lounge doors, she smiled."Well, love, it looks-"
"Spike!"Buffy screamed as she flung herself
at Spike, knocking him
backward, jarring the back of his head into his jaws.His arms
automatically grabbed the warm body that flung on to him. Drucilla was
flung somewhere away from wheelchair on to the lawn.
"What the He-"Spike started to shout when
the Slayers tongue was shoved
into his mouth and then all over his face. Then her mouth latched on to
his again. He wrenched his mouth away from hers."SLAYER?!? What the HELL
is going on?"
"Spike!" Buffy happily said as she kissed
him again."Youre so
beautiful! So strong! I love you, Spike! I finally realized it tonight!
I LOVE YOU!"
Spike stared at the Slayer in open-mouthed shock. Then
the two heard
screaming coming from the staircase, and saw Willow and Cordelia come
flying across the lawn towards them."SPIKE! SPIKE!"
Willow slid near Spikes head, and started
kissing him, then Cordelia
shoved Buffy away and started kissing his chest. "Oh Spike! Spike! I
"Me, too,"Willow said as she looked deeply
into the vampires eyes and
smiled widely at him."I love you too, Spike!"
"Hey! I saw him first!" Buffy protested,
then she shoved at Cordelia,
who fell into Willow. As this happened, Buffy resumed kissing Spike as
her hands pinned his head.
"Buffy! You have Angel!"Cordelia screamed as
she tried to shove the
Slayer. Then she felt herself lifted and flung from someone behind her.
Buffy felt herself lifted and flung away from her Spikes mouth. Willow,
who had started nibbling on Spikes ear, felt a yank just as her teeth
clamped on to his lobe, and then tasted blood as she was flung away.
"YEOWCH!! Thats my ear!"Spike screamed
when he felt the bite of the red
heads teeth, and grabbed his ear. When the pain subsided, he saw
Drucilla standing over him, warding away all comers.
"You keep away from my pet!"Drucilla growled."Hes mine!"
"Think so, Looney Tunes?"Cordelia snarled as
she menacingly approached
the female vampire with fists. Drucilla looked at the girl, somewhat
startled to see that she wasnt running away.
"Yeah, you sad excuse for a schizophrenic,
hollered, her fists in the air. Buffy grunted in agreement.
"Yeah, whatever she said, Nutso! Prepare to be
dust,"Buffy snarled as
she reached into her jacket pocket and pulled out a scone."What the HELL
"Buffy! Thats Giless scone!"Willow
shouted. Buffy looked at it for a
second, and then threw it at the snarling Drucillas face. A crack rang
out into the night. In slow motion, everyone watched as a slow dribble
of blood come from Drucillas nose.
"My nose! You hit my little nose!" she
screamed. Spike stared as he saw
Drucillas nose bleeding. Drucilla whimpered as she covered her dainty,
bleeding nose. Then he saw another brown missile hit Drucilla on the
head, and saw that it came from the girl Cordelia.
"Finally! A use for Giless scones!"Cordelia
crowed triumphantly. Then
she threw another at Drucilla."Take that you nitwitted psycho bitch!
Spike is *ours*!"
Drucilla ducked and was about to tackle Cordelia when
Willow threw a
scone that smacked into her ear. Drucilla, whimpering, shied closer to
the still grounded Spike when that scone hit her. Buffy saw this and
fury leapt into her eyes."Oh, no you dont! Get the HELL away from my
Buffy tackled the mad vampire, and they rolled on the
landed another punch on the her bloody face and then threw her away from
Spike. Drucilla got up slowly, and gave a sound between snarling and
whimpering. Buffy raised her hand to throw another scone at her,"Leave!
NOW! I may love him , but Ill DUST him to keep you from having him! So
"Spikes MY pet! MINE!" Drucilla hissed
as her mouth began to wobble.
Then her mouth straightened and she stepped closer to the Slayer. Spike
looked at the Slayer and then at Drucilla. Buffy took Spike by the shirt
and lifted him on to the picnic table. She broke off a piece of wood,
and held it close to his heart. Drucilla stopped.
"Dru?"Spike whispered. Buffy stared at the
snarled."LEAVE! NOW! And DONT come back!"
Drucilla looked at him and then ran into the night.
Spike held his
breath when Buffy looked at the stake in her hand. Then was shocked when
she threw it away and brought his mouth to hers as she stepped between
his legs. Cordelia and Willow raced towards the picnic table and seated
themselves on his sides. When Buffy let go of his mouth, and her mouth
roamed down his chest, he panted,"You girls have been drinking again,
havent you? Thats why youre like this isnt-IT?"
Spike looked down to see Buffys face rubbing
across the zipper of his
jeans, smiling like a cat that was just petted. He looked at Willow as
she rubbed his hand against her cheek, and then moved it lower. Spike
stared at her as she just grinned at him."Nope. Just chocolate. No
alcohol at all."
Cordelia grabbed his head."So were SOBER, Spike. Now pucker up!"
Angel raced down the corridor, the dweeb patrol right
behind him. <
Shit! These Dweebs run fast! Gotta lose em! Where the HELL is Buffy? >
He looked around, and stopped. He saw four figures outside the school
yard. His eyes widened in outrage and let out a great howl as he raced
Spike wiggled, trying to dislodge the Slayer from his
lap, or more
specifically from the starting to bulge of his jeans. He also tried to
move his arms, but the girls on his sides held them tight. Then his eyes
widened when he felt the moist kisses the Slayer was giving through his
jeans. And then he heard a howl.
Angel grabbed the figure that had her face buried in
Spikes lap and
threw her away. Then he grabbed the other two, and flung them away. Then
he grabbed Spikes shirt, and hauled him up."HOW DARE YOU?"
Angel lifted Spike into the air and shook him."How
dare you benefit from
my Erosbane! What hold do you have over them? WHY the HELL do they
always prefer YOU?!?"
"Maybe because Im a handsome and charming guy?"
Angels hands started tightening on Spikes
neck as he howled in
outrage."And now youll be-Ooff!"
"Let him go! You let him go!"Cordelia
screamed as she threw another
scone at him."You bully! Let him go!"
"Angel! My darling! Why do you run from me? Us?"
Giles shouted as he ran
towards the two vampires. Spike stared at the Watcher and them at Angel.
Buffys mouth opened wide at what her Watcher said. Then Xander and Oz
came running behind him.
"Angel! Let me make a song about you!"Oz
cried as he stopped beside
Giles. Willows eyes widened and then looked at Spike.
"Oh my God? Buffy is Angel gay?" Willow
screamed. Buffy stared at her
former ex-honey. Angel stared at the computer geek and was about to say
something scathing when Xander flung himself at Angels feet.
"Angel! Why are you running from us, we only love
panted."Youre so beautiful, and Im sure that Larryd be furious to
know that though Im not gay, I have a love as beautiful as you."
Spike looked at his sire."WHAT the HELL is going on?"
"Tell you later!"Angel said as shook Xander
off and hefted Spike over
his shoulder and made a dash towards the school. The Scooby gang at his
Angel slammed the door shut and dumped Spike onto a
chair. Angel the
leaned hard against the door, and panted. When he lifted his head, he
absently noted that it looked like the library, but without books. Then
he looked at Spike. Spike looked at his twisted sire and growled."Now
what the HELL is going on and what has Erosbane got to do with this?"
Angel looked at his childe angrily."I dont
have to explain myself to
"And I think you do! I nearly was raped by three
girls and those three
dweebs were about to rape you! And if Erosbane is involved, I want to
know! So out with it!"Spike snarled.
"I sprinkled Erosbane on their food to make them
horny and approachable!
Only the damn drug backfired! All right?"Angel snarled back. Spike
looked at his sire and then exploded.
"You bloody IDIOT! You wanker! Dont you
know that Erosbane makes the
user a VERY *psychotic* and *horny* and *obessive* lover when its mixed
with the wrong things?!? What foods did you sprinkle it on?"Spike
"It was chocolate stuff. Milk, cake, cookies,"Angel
Spike stared at him
"IDIOT! Add energetic to that list! Those six
will be chasing us and
having their way with us all night unless we douse them with something
"What the *hell* is going on out here?" a
voice shouted from the
darkened office. Angel looked up and snarled.
Principal Snyder looked at the man with yellow eyes
and ridges on his
forehead, and his eyes melted."My God! Youre beautiful!"
And he ran around the counter and flung himself into
Angels arms, his
mouth puckered to kiss his face. Angel growled as he struggled with the
smaller man, and then threw him over the counter. Angel leaned back
against the door again. Spike growled harshly,"Now youve got the idiot
headmaster after you! Now what, oh brilliant one?"
"Were outta here,"Angel growled as he
lifted Spike into his arms."And
youre coming. Hell if Ill let you have a horny Buffy after your ass!"
With Spike in his arms, Angel cautiously walked out
the office door, and
spied an exit a few feet down the hall. Only problem was that there was
a staircase before the exit. Spike snarled, "Now where to, oh fearless
"Shut up Spike or else Ill leave you here
to be dusted,"Angel growled
as he tiptoed to the exit. Spike snorted.
"Not as long as the drug is in the girls
system you wont. Tried to
show me that the girls want you, didnt you? Only the plan went wacky on
"Shut up, Spike, before I dust you,"Angel
gritted out as he glared at
Spike. Angel brought his face closer to Spikes, with barely a
non-existant breath between them. Spike was about to retort when they
heard a scream.
"Angel! SPIKE!"Willow screamed again."Buffy! Look!"
Angel and Spikes head shot up at the staircase,
and saw the horrified
looks of all of Buffys gang. Buffys eyes widened."Spike! What are you
doing in Angels arms?!? Are you kissing him?"
Xander blurted out,"OH, my God! Spikes Angels *lover*!"
Cordelia swung her head at Xander then at Buffy,"You
said he was a
Spike! But hes really Spike-ella! Buffy how could you lie to us!"
Oz looked at Angel with a hurt expression."Man,
how could you love that
Billy Idol wannabe, Angel? You and I couldve made music together!"
Willow swung her heard to Cordelia,"Spikes
a *homosexual*?!? NO! It
cant be! Then hed call himself Wilma or She-Spike or Silk, wouldnt
Oh, Angel, my sweet Angel, no sharper tooth than this!"Giles
precious time we could have had together, now all gone! And for
this...miscreant! Hoodlum! Homosexual Lover!"
Spike had enough and exploded. "I AM NOT A BLOODY SODOMITE!"
"Then why are you in Angels arms? You two-timing
bastard?"Buffy screamed with tears in her eyes. She stepped closer to
the two, and everyone, with a heartbroken face came closer as well.
Spike looked at the two-fisted Slayer warily.
"Now, Slayer, its not what it seems,"Spike
said cautiously."Angel here
drugged your food. Making you think that you love me."
"Likely story,"Cordelia snorted. Xander shot a hurt look at Angel.
"We couldve been great together, Angel. A
kind of forever love,"Xander
said with sad eyes."Like the stars and the moon pie in the sky thing.
But no. Youre a homo vamp, with a false heart. At least LARRY is
discreet in having lovers! But YOU! Mr. Angel-wthout-a-heart-for-love is
flaunting his lover in front of us!"
Angel snorted at him."Get real kid. It was the
drug. Im not flaunting
anything! Least of all a male lover!"
Giles continued."Its really quite horrible,
my Angel. But Xander does
have a point, we were willing to share you, but since you have chosen to
flaunt your true love in front of us, it stands to reason that you must,
Angel stared art the Watcher."Now wait a minute here, Rupert..."
Buffy ignored the other conversation and looked at
Spike."I DO *love*
you! Now if we cant have you, you have to be dusted, so that youll
always be a part of us. Im so sorry, pet,but thats the way it has to
Willow and Cordelia nodded their heads."Stake em, Buffo."
Buffy stared at Cordelia."Hey, Hawaii Five-O was
the only thing on last
Spike looked at the approaching Slayer."Now, Slayer..."
Suddenly Synder burst into the hall and tackled Angel."My
All three went flying into the wall. Spikes hand
went smashing into the
nearest fire emergency case. He quickly recovered and pulled the
extinguisher out as the head master showered Angel with kisses. Opening
it, he sprayed it at the head master in the full face, then at the rest
of the murderously jealous Slayer and her cronies.
Buffy shook her head, slightly disoriented when that
cold blast hit her
full in the face. When she regained her senses, she noticed three
things. One, Snyder was against the other side of the hall. Two, Angel
was approaching her with murderous eyes. And three, she lost her stake
somewhere. She backed up into Xanders foot."Yow!"
Turning around, she delved into his jacket pockets,
and pulled out
Giless scones. Spike saw this and shouted a warning."Look out! She has
Angel looked at Spike in confusion. With deadly aim,
she belted one at
Angels nose, and heard a satisfying crack.Angel felt blood spurt out
and was stunned to realize his nose bleeding. He touched it tenderly,
and felt the searing pain. "You broke my nose!"
"Yeah? So what! I broke Drucillas too!"
She belted another, then
another at him, causing Angel to back away to the exit."So take that!
Oz handed her his scones."Sock it to him Buffy! Scone him!"
Angel backed away with a growl and the grabbed Spike
by the shirt, and
hauled him over his shoulders."Ill be back, Buffy."
"Yeah. And Ill be here!"Buffy shouted
at him. Then she whirled around
to her friends."Is everybody all right?"
They all nodded, and the heard Principal Snyder groan.
"Yeah, lets go before Snyder wakes. Really
dont want to be
here,"Xander said, and the Scooby gang ran out to the night.
When they reached the parking lot, Giles suddenly
outrage,"You threw my scones at them!"
"Yep! Better that stakes,"Buffy said happily."Now
you just added to my
Willow looked at Xander,"So when did you find out that Larry is gay?"
"Uh...can I just say that Id rather have a
scone before I tell you
Thus endth the series...maybe.