In the arms of sleep
Author: Azziel Savament
Plot: Angelus will drive Buffy insane at any cost.
Rating: NC-17 for sex and violence.
Warning: Tissue Warning! This is really sad, and if you like happy endings, go away now! Note: I broke my forearm on Friday in a car crash, I know what you are all thinking, and no it wasn't my fault, half of this fic was typed with only one hand so keep that in mind.
DISCLAIMER: The characters aren't mine. They belong to Joss, the WB, and Mutant enemy. I'm just borrowing them. I was bored. Please, don't sue me. None of the lyrics are mine they were written by famous musicans. Not me. All I did was come up with the story line.
In the arms of sleep
Her eyes were shut as he pumped within her, loving the feeling of his skin against hers. Needing that release that he always gave her when she was in his arms. As she clenched he came within her, and she was finally given her release. She screamed "Angelus!" Then she woke up, covered in her own sweat, and cursing herself for such a dream.
You give me the reason * You give me control * I gave you me purity * My purity you stole. * Did you think I wouldn't recognize this compromise * Am I just to stupid to realize * Stale incense old sweat, the lies, lies, lies *
<Angelus. How can I think about him like that? I hate him for what he did to me, to Angel. > She thought as she enter the school that day, and was met by Willow.
"Hey Buffy!" Willow said cheerfully, but quickly picked up on Buffy's depressed mood. .
"What's wrong?" Willow asked questioningly.
"I had that dream again. I don't know what's wrong with me, how can I think about having sex with Angelus?" She looked at Willow searching for answers, but something told her she already had one.
"I really don't know what to tell you. What you and Angel had was like a fairy tale, but then when he became Angelus, the fairy tale ended." She said as she headed for the computer lab. Buffy said her good bye, and went towards the library.
It comes down to this * Your kiss * Your fist * And your stain * It gets under my skin * Within * Take in the extent of my sin * You give me the anger * You give me the nerve * Carry out my sentence * Cause I get what I deserve * I'm an effigy to be defaced * To be disgraced * Your need for me has been replace * And If I can have everything * Well then just give me a taste *
<God, why the hell am I still think about him? > Buffy was quickly sucked back into reality when Giles spoke.
"Buffy, have you heard a word that I have said? You seem to be distracted. If you are like this tonight I would not recommend that you go hunting." Giles said sternly as the door flew open, and Willow stood there speechless. All she was able to do was hold up a yellow disk, and point at it.
"Will, what is it?" Buffy asked bit confused by her best friend's actions.
Willow finally spoke up, but only was able to say two words. "The Curse." They all stood their shocked until Giles finally spoke up.
"I think you will be going hunting tonight."
Buffy sat there on the tombstone waiting for him a bit impatiently. She had already dusted three vamps that night, and if she found him she would be able to get home before dawn. Suddenly, the hair on the back of her neck stood on end. Buffy knew that he was standing behind her without having to turn.
"Hello lover." She said in a deep lustful voice, and if she got her way she would get her Angel back tonight.
"Well, well, well, aren't we feeling playful tonight?" Angelus said cynically.
"Maybe, but I don't want to play one of your games. I thing we should play mine."
"No I don't think so." He said as he lunged at her, pining her body beneath him. "I think you'll like me new game better." Buffy's courage faded when she felt his hard dick press into her hip.
I cry from the love in your eyes
I try to let you be free
If you're blue
Don't let it worry you
You'll make it through
And if you don't believe me
Angelus was ruthless, he looked at her with love filled eyes
like Angel did, but when she fell for it he looked back at her
with disgusted. "You are mine, and I will make you
mine forever." He ripped her skirt from her body,
shredded her tang top, but took his time to remove her panties.
could make a move to stop him, he had her wrists tided with her torn clothing.
Faith will come
Fear will come
"NO!" She screamed as he bit into her breast hard. With a thrust he was inside, washing away the last of her maidenhood. Again she was lost to him. She knew he was unstoppable, as his cold hard cock throbbed with in her. Tears we rolling down her face until her will was broken, and she gave into the pleasure. Not really caring anymore that it was Angelus ripping her soul away.
Cynics may fill the books
Critics may give you looks
But I'll stand by you
Until you die
And I'll be wise
In the after life
Her eyes were shut as he pumped within her, loving the feeling of his skin against hers. Needing that release that he always gave her when she was in his arms. As she clenched he came within her, and she was finally given her release. She screamed "Angelus!" Then she awoke, and went for the phone.
After a few rings, a very tired Willow finally answered the phone. "Will?"
"Hi Buffy." She answered sleepily.
"I want to do the spell." The line went dead for a moment, and then finally Willow spoke.
"Meet me at my house at sundown tomorrow, and I'll explain how to do the spell." Willow answered, and got a sound of relief from Buffy.
"Thanks Will. Good night."
"Night." Willow said as she slammed down the
phone, and returned to sleep.
Drusilla walked into the room pushing Spike's wheel chair. Angelus was sitting in a near by chair reading a book about dreamscape. Spike quickly motioned for Drusilla to stop pushing him, and he rolled over to Angelus.
"Well, mate, kill any good slayers lately?" Spike asked with a touch of seriousness in his voice.
"Fuck off Spike. I'm busy." Angelus responded without even looking up from his book.
"With what?" He asked, and glanced at the title of the book, 'Dreams.' "O, I forgot, your still trying to interpret that dream you keep having about wearing Dru's cloths, and drinking tea with Miss Edith." Spike said sarcastically.
"No Spike that's your job." Angelus quipped finally looking up from his book, and wearing a devilish grin on his face. "Well if you really want to know what I'm doing, I'll tell you. I'm using dreamscape to get into the dreams of the slayer, so I can basically mentally fuck her."
"That's great an all but, when are you going to kill her?" Before Angelus could react, Drusilla fell to the ground screaming. Both Spike and Angelus went to her side, Spike with concern for his love, and Angelus with a questioning.
" No, NO, they're hurting us again." Dru moaned as she grabbed her stomach.
"Who Dru?" Angelus asked as he helped her to her feet.
"The spell, the one with the computer, she has it."
"Well looks like I'm just going to have to pay my old
friend Willow a little visit." Angelus responded with
a devilish grin.
Location: Willow's House
Time: 10 Minutes after Sunset
Willow and Buffy were working out the last parts of the spell
in her living room, when they both realized the sun had set.
Buffy threw a few stakes into her bag, and stared to leave, but
then turned back to Willow. "Will, you ready?"
Willow nodded for Buffy to continue. "I'll look for
him at the
graveyard, and you'll stay here to do the spell. If all works out I'll have Angel back before sunrise."
Buffy headed for the door, and turned back to once again. "Good luck."
"You too." Willow said with a weak smile.
Then Buffy was gone, all Willow had to do was recite the
spell, and it should work. She double checked everything,
then grabbed the paper with the spell on it. "Neither
dead, nor of the living, I invoke you, spirit
Willow could finish her sentence she heard a knock at her door.
"Its open Xander, come in!" She yelled as she
threw a blanket over her altar. <Must be Xander.
I can't let him know we're doing the spell. >
When the opened the door she was met by her fear. <O god, Its Angelus! > "So nice of you to invite me in." Angelus said as he lunged at her, pining her under his strong body, and whispered into her ear what he was going to do to her.
*She's been here so many times before, she can't
When she last felt anything before, but this fear and anger
She stares intently at the door, listening for his footsteps
She knows exactly what's in store, and the knowing makes it worse. *
Buffy sat atop a tombstone, just waiting. It seemed like hours, but according to Buffy's watch it had only been a few minutes. She was about to give up, to go back to Willow's and wait until the spell was done. <That would be so much easier. > She thought as she jumped off the head stone, and started to head for Willow's.
*When he calls her daddy's little girl, she doesn't
And when he crushes her, she can't feel her screams are silent
Hides in the corner of her mind where she plays contentedly
She leaves the nightmare far behind, escapes inside her mind. *
Willow laid unresponsive as Angelus ripped her T-shirt from her body. It was as if she was no longer there, but she was still alive. Angelus fondled her small breast; licking and biting them until he drew blood. He was no longer getting the enjoyment he thought he would, from someone as pure as Willow. All she did was lay there like a dead fish. Angelus couldn't take it any longer; he lifted her by her neck, and snapped it like a small branch.
Before Angelus left, he placed the body in the center of the room next to the altar. He never really noticed it under the cloth. As he reach the front door he could see Buffy walking to the house in the distance, and he smiled. <Perfect. > He thought as he bolted into the shadows of the house.
Buffy walked toward Willow's house, and notice that the front door was open. <Maybe Xander just came over. > She thought as she entered the house to find her best friend dead. She was topless, her breast covered with bits, and her neck was broken. <O god. What has my Angel done? >Buffy turned and ran from the house as if she was running for her life.
Angelus came from the shadows wearing a smile. "I
just love when she does that."
Location: Buffy's House
Time: Around 9:00pm
She seemed to be running forever; mindlessly she led herself
home. Her heart still aching from the site of her best
friend dead at the hands of her one true love. Buffy never
even realized that she wasn't really alone. He was there. It was
Angel, now only a translucent form, but Angel none the less.
He had always been there, but she never really felt his presents.
Now there was
something different, she could feel him.
She laid there on her bed crying for what seemed like hours. She did not really become aware of his presents until her stereo suddenly came on. It was their song, and right now it mirrored the way she was feeling.
*Sleep will not come to this tired body now
Peace will not come to this lonely heart
There are some things I'll live without
But I want you to know I need you right now
I need you tonite. *
She could feel him sit beside her on the bed, and slowly entangled her in his arms. He caressed her back, when she turned there was nothing, but air coming from her open window. Buffy returned facing the wall, and once again felt his touch flowing with the music.
*I steal a kiss from her sleeping shadow moves
Cause I'll always miss her wherever she goes
And I'll always need her more than she could ever need me
I need someone to ease my mind
But sometimes a someone is so hard to find. *
The more she felt his touch, the more it drove her craze. It was making it hard for her to think, to feel, and to even breathe. Then she heard him whispering into her ear. "I will always love you, but you must kill me." She turned once more, but still found the room bare.
*She comes to me like an Angel out of time
As I play the part of a saint on my knees
There are some things I'll live without
But I want you to know that I need you right now
Suffer my desire
Suffer my desire
Suffer my desire for you. *
When she awoke, Buffy knew what had to be done, but it was not
what Angel wished of her. She knew she couldn't live
without Angel, and now she was going to join him. "I
have nothing left, I'm going give myself to Angelus." She
thought aloud, and she left her room to seek out her ex-lover.
The night's air was cold, and left a chill on her skin as she
entered the graveyard. It was going to end tonight one way
or another. It only took her a few moments to sense him; he was
waiting for her, and ready for the fight. Angelus slowly came out
from the mausoleum with a mischievous grin on his
"Hello lover. Are you ready?" He asked playfully. She did not answer him; all she did was stick her hand into her pocket and took a small knife out. "You do realize that won't kill me, lover." Angelus said as he saw the small pocketknife.
She walked right up to him, pulled his head down to her level, and whispered into his ear. "I love you." With those words Buffy shoved Angelus away from her, and looked to the heavens, then spoke once more. "Angel forgive me." Tears began to roll down her cheeks as she brought the knife to her throat.
"NNNNOOO!" Angelus screamed as he grabbed the blade from her hands before she was able to slash her throat completely. "You will not get away from me that easily. Your mine, that means forever." He said as he ripped part of his shirt off, and placed it over the wound on her throat.
Buffy prayed for death as Angelus bandaged her wound, but it would never come. Then something strange happened, clarity. True clarity, she finally knew what was it was she had to do. Flashes came to her of Willow's altar, it was still there, untouched by the police or Angelus. Now all she had to do was get away from Angelus.
She knew that wasn't going to be easy since he seemed so attentive to her wound. He kept his hand pressed on her throat until it stop bleeding, luckily he had been able to stop her before she was able to make the wound deep enough to kill. <Damn fool, what was she thinking? > Angelus thought as he made sure the cute would not reopen. When Buffy became aware of the reality around her again, she slapped his hand away from her neck.
"What were you thinking? How stupid are?" Angelus asked in a concerned tone, the kind that only Angel had used with her. Buffy was becoming very confused <Does he really care? > Those notions were dispelled when Angelus finished his questionings. "You know I'm the one that's going to kill you, you shouldn't ever try to take that prize away from me."
She stared at Angelus for a moment then turned away from him. "So many voices." She started saying as Angelus crept closer. "So many voices telling what to do, but I going to do what I want to do." When she turned back to him, they were about an inch apart. Every part of her mind screamed for her to run, but she ignored her better judgment.
Angelus brought his arms around her waist, pulling her close,
and quickly clamped his lips to hers violently. They
entangled each other in the others body, it looked as though the
two lovers had never parted. Wordlessly she told him that
she needed him, but it was still killing her inside. The
deeper the kiss became the more breath she needed, but Angelus
was not going to allow
it. When she tried to brake the kiss, he grabbed her by her ass, and forced her crotch to grind into his throbbing pelvis.
Buffy was finally able to get away from him by kneeing him in
the groin hard. Angelus dropped for a second time from that old
trick. When she saw that it had worked she started running
the other direction. Knowing then that there was only one
real way to end it now.
Location: Willow's House
Time: 5 minutes later
She ran back to the place that she should have in the first
place, Willow's. When she entered the house it still reeked of
death even though Willow's body was no longer there. When she saw
the chalk outline in the living room she almost busted out in
tears again, until she saw the blanket covering something.
When she pulled it away she found the altar with the orb still in
place, and the spell next to it.
She quickly grabbed the spell, and started to read it.
"Neither the dead, nor of the living, I invoke you, spirit
of the passing! Return to the body what distinguishes man
from beast!" At first nothing happened until she felt
something enter her, and began to speak threw her. "Te
implor Doamne, nu
aceasta rugaminte. Nici mort, nici al fintei, te invoc, spirit altrecerii! Lasa orbita sa fie vasul care-i va transporta sufletul al el."
As she spoke Angelus stormed into the house know full well what she was trying to do. When he attacked her, he was sent flying in the other direction by some invisible force. "Asa sa fie! Asa sa fie! Acum! Acum!" The orb glowed brightly, and then disappeared.
Angelus screamed and thrashed violently until his eyes glowed yellow like the orb had, and then it was done. Angel soul was now returned, and Buffy was no longer in a trance. She quickly ran over to Angel to see if the spell had worked, but deep down inside something had told her it had.
"Angel! Angel?" She asked fanatically until he looked up at her with tear filled eyes.
"Buffy? What happened?" <O god he doesn't remember. > Angel said as he embraced her tenderly.
"It's not important now, let's just go home." Buffy said as they helped each other to the door.
"Buffy? Why were we at Willow's?" Angel asked as they walked towards his apartment.
"No more questions, we have all the time in the world for questions. Right now I just want us to go home."
They finally reached the apartment a few minutes later, those last few minutes were fill with an unpleasant silence. Angel knew something was wrong, but couldn't quiet put his finger on it. When they enter his small one room apartment he notice a thick layer of dust on everything, the bed was unmade, and a few thing were missing. <Something just isn't right. > Angel thought as he sat in a near by chair.
"Buffy, what gives? The last thing I remember is that it was your birthday, and we were " Angel paused and looked at his hands for a moment, then back at her. "Together. Yet I feel like I haven't seen you in months, and my apartment looks as if I haven't been here in months. What's going on?"
"Nothing, just this." She said seductively as she slowly walked over to him, and sat on his lap. "I want you, now!" Buffy responded in an ordering tone.
Angel did not hesitate on her request, and flipped her into a
straddling position. She could feel his length threw the
leather, and she knew then she needed him more then life it self.
She quickly went for the buckle on his pant and ripped off his
belt. He was just as aggressive by tearing her tang
top from her body, and found that she was not wearing a bra. As a matter of fact he quickly learned that she wasn't wearing any underwear either, when she freed his manhood, and sank deep within her. Buffy's eyes rolled inside her head as he entered her. For just the slightest moment she was able to forget everything that happened.
Angel pumped within her for what seemed like hours, both thrusting to the point that the chair nearly broke beneath them. The joining was even deeper this second time when it seemed as if their souls were touching. They both neared climax, and Buffy bared her neck to him. As his fangs sank in that tender flesh she was give her final release of the night, and Angel was given his. They seemed to melt together, and all of their problems seemed to just slip away. They laid there for what seem like forever, both sleeping in each other's arms, and never really parting completely.
It was around dawn when Angel finally awoke, and found
himself still deep within her. He genteelly lifted her off
his resting organ, trying not to wake her, and placed her in his
bed so she could continue to sleep peaceful. Unfortunately that
is when it hit him, all the memories, all the sins, and all
the things he did to Buffy came back to him in a flash of pain. <O god! What have I done? > He thought as the flash came to him.
All the things he did to try to drive Buffy insane, killing
Miss Calendar, and worst of all killing innocent little Willow.
<How could she still want me after what I did to her? >
Angel thought as he reached for the blinds, and held tightly to
the cord that kept the light out. Angel glance back to the
bed where Buffy was sleeping, and then back to the window. "Please forgive me." He whispered to her as he pulled the cord, and let the light fill the room.
Buffy heard him whisper to her, and her eyes flew open to see he trying to kill himself. She quickly jumped from the bed and shoved him out of the light back into the shadows of his apartment. <Damn fool, What was he thinking. > She thought as she ran to his side.
"What were you thinking? How stupid are?"
Buffy asked in a concerned tone, the kind that she only used with
Angel. Angel was becoming very confused <Does she still
love me? > Those notions were dispelled when Buffy
finished her questionings. "You know I'm the one
that's going to kill you Angelus. You shouldn't ever try to take
that prize away from me." She finished saying as
she help him to his feet, and then left his apartment.
Angel just watched as she strolled out of his apartment. "Huh?" Angel thought aloud, and then became very confused.
A week later Angel learned that the demon inside of him was no
longer there. He still had his hunger for blood, but the lust for
the kill was completely gone. At first this over joyed
Angel until he realized where the demon had gone. That last
acted of love rather then freeing the demon within him self
it was released into her. There was now only one thing left to do.
A month past with no sign of her, until she showed up at his apartment. When she enter she found the room empty except for a note. It was addressed to her, and read as follows.
I can no longer stay knowing what I did to you. All I can say is that I'm sorry, and that I will never stop loving you.
Buffy read the note, and laughed. When she turned to leave Angel stood there between her and the door. "Move or I'll stake you." She ordered. Before she was able to act on her threat Angel plunged a stake threw her heart causing her to explode into dust.
"Good bye my love." Were his last words before
he picked the stake up rammed it into his chest. Then all
there was, was silence in the ash filled room, the music of their
love had finally came to an end.
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